Around 14 years ago, I dated the girl who would eventually be your wife. And then your ex-wife. I learned that you were insecure and obsessed with her past relationships, and me in particular. You stalked me, and lurked on my website. You even told her to demand that I take down this photo from my Boston trip in 2007. I guess you weren’t man enough to do it yourself. And respecting her wishes, I removed it.
Well now we’re friends again, and I know how you mistreated her. So look what I found on a web cache! And this time, it’s staying here FOREVER.
(Posted with her consent, keeping her needs and wishes in mind. Crazy concept!)